Surviving after graduation

Our twenties are supposed to be some of the best days of our lives, or at least so we’re led to believe. For many of us, we’ve finally (hopefully) gotten to grips with the reality of University or College, it’s the time when we take our first steps into the working world, enjoy our first real tastes of freedom, and move off into the ‘real world’.

In fact, there is a HELL of a lot of pressure to know what you want to do, who you want to be, or be in the process of figuring this out. Anyone else? Just me..? It is TERRIFYING.

One of the most difficult things for me has been this transition between the security of university where everyone is in the same boat and the reality of working a full-time job in a town where you have little to no connection, other than chance.  Being without the support network that I spent the last four years curating is incredibly difficult. Why did nobody think to mention this to me? Did I miss the part where we were warned of how difficult it is to make friends as an adult in a new town? I really hope I’m not alone in this…

If I could go back to this time last year and give myself a piece of advice, it would be to stop worrying about finding a job after university, and instead to enjoy my final year surrounded by the chosen family I love so much. Take time away from useless stress and spend dedicated, uninterrupted time with my friends, because I miss them now more than words can say. It never occurred to me that this might be my only time to live with my best friend, and I will never get over how stupid I feel for not taking greater advantage of that.

With that being said, what can you do to help settle in the transition between university and adult life?

I think the first thing I can recommend is not to compare your life to that of your friends/classmates/that of your parents, especially where social media is concerned. I know this is far easier said than done, but trust me, it’s a lot easier if you can remind yourself that the things you see on Facebook and Instagram are not real life. Your friends are probably just as scared, uncertain and lonely as you are!

Secondly, keep in touch!

After four years with some of your best friends, it’s a huge adjustment moving from seeing your friends whenever you want, to hardly at all. It’s funny, but I actually found it harder to text my friends after graduation, because I was terrified of showing them how alone I felt and seeing them living a life without me! However, the more I speak to my friends, the easier it is: who’d have thought? Of course Skype and Facetime aren’t the same as a movie night with your best friends, but I certainly find it helps me to feel a little more normal if I can just sit down and chat away with my friends. Those girls will always be there for me, no matter how far apart we might be!

And this doesn’t just apply to friends either. Don’t forget about your family, especially when you’ve moved away from home.

Number three: Remember that it’s alright not to be alright at first! Taking the plunge into ‘adult life’ is a huge step, and it’s completely normal to be worried, lonely, and scared. When you move away from the security of home and university, it’s going to be tough, but I promise you, it’s worth it to stick it out! This is maybe the only time in your life where you have the chance to live on your own and even feel lonely! Leaving home and moving some 300 miles away to my first job has been DIFFICULT. There have been too many times where I have sat and cried because I felt like I had made the biggest mistake of my life, but deep down, I know this has been such a worthwhile learning experience. I’m yet to feel settled here, four months down the line, but I don’t think I’d give up this experience for the world.

I think the best piece of advice I can give, is to be brave and take the plunge. I know it’s tough, but you are so strong. You can do this. Good luck.